{"id":77,"date":"2011-07-04T10:51:58","date_gmt":"2011-07-04T17:51:58","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/peteventers.com\/blog\/?p=77"},"modified":"2011-07-04T10:51:58","modified_gmt":"2011-07-04T17:51:58","slug":"go-boom","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/peteventers.com\/blog\/2011\/07\/04\/go-boom\/","title":{"rendered":"Things That Make You Go BOOM"},"content":{"rendered":"

It’s 4th of July and here in Seattle there’s been people letting off fireworks in the dead of night for about three days now. Oh, the joy.<\/p>\n

Me, I’m not a fan of publicly available fireworks. I much prefer the local authorities to put on a show and leave it in the hands of (presumably) professionals. You usually get a more impressive display and a lower injury rate. I was unfortunately once witness to a bottle rocket’s bottle tipping just before take off and firing the rocket into a crowd of spectators and I’ve never really felt the same way about fireworks ever again. <\/p>\n

Anyway, whatever shenanigans you’re up to, stay safe. Goblins, on the other hand, should be encouraged to play with fire at all times. Remember this very important formula;<\/p>\n

Goblins + (Fire and\/or Explosions) = Hilarity!<\/p>\n

I’d now like to demonstrate with samples from just one set – 2003’s Scourge<\/em>;<\/p>\n

Goblins with burning rock projectiles = Fun!
\n\"Incoming!\"
\nGoblin War Strike.<\/p>\n

Goblins with pillar of fiery doom = Comedy gold.
\n\"Leaving!\"
\nPyrostatic Pillar, which had the working title of Bug Zapper.<\/p>\n

Whether they’re having a ball raining incendiaries down upon their enemies or running for their lives, nothing goes better with hot flaming death than a whole bunch of goblins. It’s true. I looked it up.<\/p>\n

And finally, please try not to stab anyone’s eye out with a sparkler! Unless it’s an actual goblin, then that’s probably okay. Probably<\/em>. Just remember, if you feel like picking a fight with a goblin, you better be ready to fight a dozen more. At least.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

It’s 4th of July and here in Seattle there’s been people letting off fireworks in the dead of night for about three days now. Oh, the joy. Me, I’m not a fan of publicly available fireworks. I much prefer the local authorities to put on a show and leave it in the hands of (presumably) […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[25,55,39,20,56],"class_list":["post-77","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-art","tag-25","tag-fire","tag-goblin","tag-magic-the-gathering","tag-scourge"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/peteventers.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/77","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/peteventers.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/peteventers.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/peteventers.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/peteventers.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=77"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/peteventers.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/77\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/peteventers.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=77"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/peteventers.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=77"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/peteventers.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=77"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}